Latino Resume

I found this somewhere and thought it was funny so here ya go. Laugh I tell ya!

MARTHA MARIA MIRANDA FIGUEROA DELACRUZ DE LOS SANTOS DE EL CAMINO DE LA REINA

15 SOUTH PROJECTOS, APARTAMENTO EL BAISMAN
EL BRONX, NUEVA JORK, WUNG WUNG FOR SERO SERO
SELULA FON: (917) 555-5555 (Selula turnt off but I will get de monee
orden tumoro)

Fon de la casa: neybor's fon, (788) 999-9999) mines is turnt off for me
not payin.

OBJECTED: Wung day I wanna opin a Day Kare in mine apartment for teng
kidz.


SKELLZ: I wash my sisters kidz wheng she goes to de dancen at Latin
Quarta,shange the kidz pamperz, misk de milk and chocolate Quik in da botella while I wash de novelas at de saing tine.

EJUCACION: I grajuaded from fif grade. Deng I grajuated from aighf
grade. Deng I learnt alot from my Tia Juana, (she used to be my Tio Juan) she let me quik skool so she cood show me to babysit my cozins, Juan, Pito, Tito, Flaco, Papo, Chavel, Chavelo, and Ivette (dito, she dunt nose who her papi iz)

WORK ESPERIENCE: Wheng I got tired of babysittin, I worket in a
fabrica sowing and stealing dresses.

Reason for Leabing: My jefe, Hector, tried to hit on me eng his woman
Luz maria caught himg. Deng I got anofa jub at B.I.M. (V.I.M.) storez, I
wuz eng charge of folding de genes.

Reason for Leabing: My Tio Papo died in my country and I hadda to go to
the funeraria. I didn't no him, but I hadda to go for mortal support. So my
jefe got mad and fired me. Deng I stayed home and sol Abon (sold Avon).

Reason For Leabing: I hadd to quik becose I orderd mucho stuff for my
familia and dey didneg paid. So weng Abon axed me furr de monee I
didneg hab it. So I qualify to get my own Day Kare. Deng my last jub was at "My Baby Papi Day Kare" I wached all the kidz for all de moders who hadda to get offe welfeal.

REFERENCES: Jus call the payfon ecross de estreet and ask anywung ebout Maria La Loca, dey tell ju all ebout me