Jose

When I was younger I hung out with mostly guys. They were easier. There was honesty. There wasn’t the passive aggressiveness or tit for tat that usually comes with being friends with the same gender. Punishing each other with petty stuff. One of my closest friends who unfortunately left us early was truly one of the best friends I’ve ever had. There probably isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t think of him. I didn’t get to say goodbye but maybe that’s what was best.

We communicated through sarcasm and that’s probably why we got along so well. But when it really came down to it, he would always have my back. He would defend me when I needed it. Kick my butt into gear when it was required. I remember him calling me upset one day because a guy that I was talking to had said something derogatory about me. His feelings were so hurt for me. He kicked him out of the car. There was also a day where I was crying about dudes and why they’re so lame. He said “Yamell, look at you. You really think it’s you? You are beautiful, you’re funny as hell, you dress nice, you’re the whole package. Eff them (only he said the word). There’s a problem with them.” One of the best pep talks I’ve ever had. Because I knew he meant it. And that it came from a good place. He trusted me with his life. With his kids and with his heart. He told me things that he didn’t just tell anyone. And there was a mutual respect. All the time. He took care of me and I took care of him. I wish all friendships could be that seamless. Effortless. I miss him.